needs

What can i ask for, when the most basic is not even there. *Sighs*

互相残杀!

I waited you for the whole night. And this is what i get. Good. Keep it up. Continue doing this to each other and i'm pretty sure that you will never get to see my smiling face anymore.















i like you very much. can you don't hurt me..?
it's okie. not like you are going to care or comfort me also. For you, it's always not your fault. it's mine. Sorry~

is it really so difficult to put a little effort and sacrifice for me..?

overtime

j'ai apprendre ma leçon~!!!! i'll remember this forever. will not touch beer anymore until i'm physically and mentally recover.  vomited for 3.5 times and hangover for few hours. luckilly daddy is available to chat with me. i'm better after eating apple. i guess rm50, i not only experience barrel beer but also process of drunk-ing and vomiting. another thing money can't buy is daddy's advise. i shall be a better good girl from now on~ i've my ideal idol already. there is no reason i can't be success like them.

Week 11 Term 5

Week 11

Wednesday- went back to sunway. 3pm for F&B commis. Hmnn.. not bad. at first I tot was a waste of time. At least we got some exposure on how final in term 6 gonna be like. Hehe.. went home and study for law. @.@

Thursday- law tests. Law law law… after paper, went home to study French and English. Dunnoe y feel so relaks. Took a nap. Woke up study French. Hmnn… doesn’t feel like studying. Wanna sleep but keep rolling on bed. Maybe I feel excited about 16.12. can’t deny the fact that this date bring great impact on me. I am an emotional people. I wish this day I can spend with someone important. Maybe we cannot have fine food but I don’t mind. I don’t mind eating hawker stall. I just wish you were here accompanying me on this memorable day. But we are living in a realistic world. People don’t see the value in it. Money money money. Busy busy busy. Time time time. I don’t wish to surrender just like this. I hope I can go against it but I remain quite. Well... I’m just standing in his point of view. The day has past means it’s over. Even if we celebrate on another day, for me, it will not be the same anymore. It’s just like valentine and bufdae. I hope to spend it with somebody special and not anybody. if you say can we celebrate now, I’ll reply nah… it’s fine and I am broke now. If things like this is not important for you, I shall not hold a grudge on it too. Let things flow by itself is the best!

Celebrated my Christmas yesterday with uni’s friends. freaking awesome day. How am I suppose to store them in my memory so that they are fresh all the time. Hehehhee…. On the 16^th which was Friday, we had French and English final paper. After 5pm, we are all officially freeeee… yahuuu… then we went to sunway pyramid. Some hunting for present while some finding for wrappers and boxes. Elaine, lauren and I did some shopping too. Nothing good was found. Hehe.. after that, I quickly went back home to pack some stuff like presents and daily routine care products. Coz imma gonna sleep together with elaino that night. Hehe.. once reach, we went to put things and settle a while. Then, eat nasi goring kampong. !@@##$$%^^ the fried rice is super good yet super spicy. Arghhh…. After that, kickstart my present surprise. Hehe… do and do. No matter how tiring, I must keep it done so they can get surprise gift on that very special day. I’m so guilty that I cannot prepare for all on time. There are still certain people that not yet recive. In progress… hahhaas… je suis desole~ slept at 4am.

Saturday- 17^th

Woke up by ben’s morning call. Quickly continue doing ponda and wrap all of them. Huh~ shower and wake elaino up. hahaha… took a pic of her when she is sleeping. Her sleeping style is damn imba. Sleep with her phone beside like talking and the main thing is thr is connection with Daniel lerh. Their conversation is not off. @.@ packed and get ready. Imma bought the wrong size box. Went sunway to change. After that headed to Ben’s apartment. After he got ready, we wanted to eat pasta buffet nearby his place. However, it’s not available on weekend. Yeerssszzz… went to giant kelana jaya to eat KFC à sushi king. Hahahas… had my dunnoe what set. It was yummie. Then everyone gather at Ben’s place. We are heading to i-city shah alam. Yuhuuu… it was raining heavily. Went to play laser tag. Nyahahhaha… it was fun and a new experience. Laser tag tag tag tag… shout’s from elaino. Ivan’s secret hiding place and running here and thr. One word FUN. Hehe.. after play, next destination is to Mr.Adrian’s house. His house is well decorated. Everything has a touch. His toilets, bedroom, guestroom, living room and kitchen. His house is not common. Is like a ikea showhouse with a beautiful decorated Christmas tree. Hahahas.. coz most of his things bought from ikea. Hahahas.. that day, ah young ni got rape by those guys. Muaahhaa… Then we go to pasar malam together with jervonn and catherine. At first I tot just walk walk around and have dinner. Mana tau I shop with elaino. Bought this and that. Seriously cheap and nice looking. That’s y it attract us. Hehe.. we even buy until no money. Elaino need to walk all the way till the end for atm. Pai she arhh.. I din bring much cash. So, I owe her RM45 and zhen han Rm5.50 for pan mee. I think I owe zhen han a lot. Coz he fetch me home always. I dunnoe how to say thanks. Perhaps a gift. But what ya..???? sakit-nya kepala. Among everyone, I am the only one that did not walk the whole pasar malam. I got stranded at that one stall. Huh~ after some time, we are called to balik. Hahahas.. reached mr.adrian rumah. We started our climax activity. Hehe… 

mr.adrian’s gift was indeed to me. Wahahhaa.. it was a French dictionary. I don’t have one and always wanted to have one. Now I got it. Thank cute very much sir. I’ll use it forever. After diploma still got degree. It will be very very useful.

Peter by zhen han – police underwear.

Ivan by ah young ni- Malaysia ball

Lewlica by ben- catty

Karen by peter- catty

Mr.lim by Karen- tumblr

Ben by lewlica- tumblr

Ah young ni by eujin kor- shirt

Zhen han by mr.lim- shirt

Mr.adrian by teddy- decoration things

Yi ling by Elaine- soaps

Elaine by ivan- domokun with a lot newspaper. =.=’’’

Conclusion, you get to see 2 pair of people give the same things. Lewlica and Karen receive and gift the same presents. Hahahas…

Last but not least, each of us got a gingerbread kid from lewlica. Ah young ni, ivan, ben and panda got my handmade jumping clay. They are so happy to receive my mini gifts. Je suis happy. I’m in love to see their reaction once they saw what they get. It’s like happily ever after. My effort is appreciated. Thank god. Hehe..

We had some chat zone with snacks and drinks provided by mr.adrian. mr.lim was sick and unable to join us. L chat and chat and chat. It’s around 1.30am. we are tired and yi ling start to fall sick already. Quickly say our farewell and went home. Thanks zhen han for sending us. Went home, bath and sleep. It’s tiring~ before sleep, I recall what we have done whole day. Sleep with smile. Hehe..

Sunday- woke up naturally, roll and roll on bed. Slowly clean everywhere, packed, have a light brunch and start my journey. Dunnoe y, I am enjoying taking public transport and kinda like the feel. I am getting use to it already. Adapting real well. Muahaha… reached home. And now, I’m getting ready for Overtime later with ma darlings.. muahahha…

Week 10 Term 5

I’ve forgotten that there are rules to follow in love. Maybe some will continue to follow while some take things for granted. And some go beyond limit. Never disturb or involve in the activities of your partner. No matter how much you wanna be with them, just let go and dun give a damn. Be honest. You may not know how deep you can hurt the person although it’s just a white lie. Never demand never request never expect. Never question why. Just answer tres bien. Never show your true feeling. In your opinion it’s just simple care. But for him, it will be control, burden and torturing. Things will never be the same anymore. Some little tradition you wish to follow might not interest him anymore. Just accept fact that people change throughout time. This is reality and my fantasy love life can only happen in my dream.

Before criticize, look at yourself and judge. I am not that good either. I do have my weaknesses. I follow my heart to deal with things while you think logically. That’s why we are different.

No matter what happen, you can never complaint. Because your soul mate is choosen and accepted by you. Even if he bully or doesn’t treat you good, you can only say sorry to yourself. Cannot blame others and cannot tell others, Nobody will understand especially him.

Week 10

Monday- is a hapi hapi day. Went to uni with eugin kor and sau sau Karen. Hehee… early in the morning got called to wake up by hubby boy. What a lovely morning. Ate cornflakes as breakfast. Quickly went back to my apartment and take bath. Huh… I’m late. Hehe… then, got back home early coz got no mr.kenny class. But tomolo got his assessment. Hmnn.. studied and sleep early. coz very tired.!

Tuesday- class at 10am. But we are the judge for thinking skill. First day of presentation by group 1,2,3. Walao e… new experience through this project for being a judge. Get to see ivan’s the other side. Shooting ppl side. =.=’’’ then continue for account class and law. Account need to do as much as possible. Coz Saturday is account as first exam. And law is freaking complicated. Gotta work out on it. There goes midterm assessment from mr.kenny at week 10. Ishh.. anyway, six questions and there are all good. Hahahas…At home, did account prepare for exam.

Wednesday- Law class at 8am. Esshhh… then got a long break. We went to grub and library theatre. Was so sleepy for the whole day. Got chef shaari test. 20 true or false questions and .. .  hahhaas… went home and prepared dinner. Hmn.. studied for mr.gopi assessment.

Thursday- went to Mr.Adrian cubicle. Checked that they have airasia promotion. Wanted to go Bangkok. Look at bank account and cancel that plan. No money. Where also cannot go. >< presentation from 2^nd group. I think first group is better. Hahahs.. went for kitchen class. This time, it’s gao gao lik. There is a lot of strange object in the tool box. Hahhahaa.s…

Friday- woke up early and went uni to study for assessment. Quite well. And then went out to have lunch. After French, it’s mr.kenny final assessment. We draw names to pick ppl who we are giving gifts. Very happy. Then we deliberate the champion for DH40 thinking skill assignment. Chat until 7pm lerh. It was fun. Ahahhas.. Went home after that. Cooked egg toast. Wash clothes packed luggage and slept at 10.30pm. it was too tiring and I not yet study for account!

Saturday- woke up at 6am. Study study study account. Luckilly still got some time for me to sleep. Woke again quicky get ready and go uni.  Sat for account paper. What… the objectives is more difficult than subjective Haizzz… took bus to pudu. Got sesated at kl for awhile. Hmnn.. dislike. Then found Pudu bus station. Went back sban. Reached, went to tapao food with mom. Mom say, tomolo follow me go kl. I said I don’t want. Then mom force me to go. If not she will go alone. As the youngest, just follow only lorh. Then mei kee said she is at Times Square. I am around that area also what. Ishhh.. anyway, my plan is to shop at Terminal one. Hiak hiak~! Went to try dresses nearby my house. Not very fitting. Then went to boyfie house. Slept while he played Dota. At night, need to go cousins bufdae party. Went with boyfie and mummy. Hmnn,…. Eat , walked around and talked. Quite romantic. Hehe.. on lappie, download drama and sleep..zzz

Sunday-  woke up, get ready and went to kl. Uncle fetched us from Sri Petaling. I freakingly dislike dislike dislike going there. Going to a place that doesn’t belong to me. I don’t like. There is a gap between us by money. Anyway, the show just start for a while and ended soon went cousin sister is sick and send us to Mid Valley. Shop with mommy at there. Bounce into lai ma and family. I’m so happy to see them. ^^ urghhh.. after shop then only saw a lot of things ngam me at momoe. Hmnn.. should have go there earlier. And then mom din get to buy her dinner dress. I spend quite a lot. Bags, clothes and shoes. Haizz… sinful sinful. But I feel like buying more better if I can buy whole range. Haha.. So, I decide maybe I cancel going to penang and shop more. Teehee…

Week11

Monday- huh…. I am stuck with all presents for the whole day. You guys better appreciate what I do for you all. And of course, I sincerely hope all of you like it. Hehee… is a little little surprise. ^^

Tuesday- here I am now. Sitting in front of lappie. Should be studying for French and Law. Hmnn.. later will kickstart. Mom went to try evening dress with auntie. Leaving me at home foodless. Ishh.. k la. Story stop till here. good luck to all my friends that sit for exams. 

and festive mood is officially ON!

Week 7 Term 5

It seems like moi did not blog for a while. Hehe.. get back in line. Coz I seriously wanna keep all my memories in words. They will be gone when people grow up. Sometimes I think back my childhood. I tot of, ehh… I used to do this, like that when I am that age. I use to think back my primary and secondary activities. Hmn.. tertiary activity is a little cacat-ed. I did not get to do things I want. Coz I got some other burden which say NO. For example, I wish I can drop by kl during weekdays. But transport is a main problem and most importantly, KL is different from Seremban. Not say u want go then can reach ald. Hehe…

So fast already reach Thursday of week 7. I remembered we need to submit articles and sit for our mid-term assessment. Huh.. Luckilly it was about eco-tourism. Hence, I can still remember some points that our group presented. After that, had our usual kitchen class. This time, we cooked salmon pate salad as starter, chicken for main course and crepe as dessert. During break time, I stayed back and fried French fries. Hapi hapi. Hahahas… the class ended earlier and we keep washing washing till finish. First time efficient sial.. hehe…

Friday- Beverage study class cancelled. Went for French class and straight head back to Seremban. This time, I brought a guest back together. It was Miche Miche. Hehee… She is attending her cousin wedding at PD and her uncle lives near my house. Weird right. We are actually this close to each other. This is first event of what I say “yuen fen”. Hahas.. Karen fetch us to Bandar Tasik Selatan. Thanks Karen. I owe u one chatime. Hahahhas… From there, we took ktm to Seremban. At thr, meet someone special. It was boyfiee… hehehe.. he missed a train. Therefore, he got to meet us.  2^nd event of “yuen fen”. Then we stop at NIlai. Koko and ah yee bring us back to Seremban. Reach le, we went to Sin Yit Sing for dinner at 11pm. Hhahaha… Miche got to try fish head meehon and salted eggie crabbie. That time, I feel like bringing my gang of friends to come Seremban and feed them till fat fat. Hahahas… Send her home and I back to mine too. Hehe… From the dinner, I tot of 1 thing. That is not to be so calculative. Not everything can be count. Many of us I mean me myself, I am stubborn in this. Sometimes I think not to owe people so I give exact amount. But some people refuse to take exact amount. I know some of you don’t mind the small amount of things. But I . . .  haizzz… Hmnn… I just got to know this lately. So, I will slowly learn this. Please forgive me if I am being too calculative. I know is a bad attitude. Will slowly be more lenient in future. Hehe.. One thing I can for sure is, if I am rich, this is not even a thing for me to tot of.

Saturday- went to hubby’s house whole day. When I’m back home, I got to know that, tomorrow is my cousin brother’s wedding. Too sudden. I did not even bring my make up set back. Huhu… 

Sunday- woke up early, dress up and went for yam cha sessions. Too my surprise, I saw Geraldine’s family. They are from the girl side. Hmnn.. this will be the 3^rd event of “yuen fen”. Why I say this is because Geraldine and I had been 11years of schoolmate. Out of a sudden, we became relatives. So koko’s wedding, we plan to invite them. Hehe… At night, went to Nilai Loong Sing for dinner. First time had my Buddha Jump over the Wall. All I can say is those expensive herbs thrown into the jug and slow cook. So the taste is kinda traditional. After dinner, 2^nd koko fetched me back to Sunway. Of course I took this opportunity to carry lotsa stuff. LOL. Reached home and dummmp….. sleep. Tired~

Week 8

Monday- yawn… class as usual. Is just we got French assignment at computer lab. At night start to prepare rdod miss Vivian notes for Wednesday assesment.

Tuesday- same same. During finance class, I skipped half of the class and went loitering at lab to print notes. Hehe.. and law class at that time is seriously serious boring lorh. Hehe… Continue to draft notes. Hehe…

Wednesday- early in the freaking morning is law. Sleepy. Can’t even concentrate. Weird thing is after that class, I am very energetic. Lol… study study study for RDOD arhhh… I din even get to study. Draft notes oni. Hehe.. Btw, that time we are actually preparing Ivan’s present. It was a book. And I think we scribble the book a lot. Cacated but memorable. Imagine he read the bookie 10years later. Sure there will be some sentimental moment of he misses us. Awwww… As usual, Chef Shaari class, nobody listen. Haha… During evening, we went to kitchen for tomrrow’s event mise en place. Our pastry side has everything ready thanks to Chef Karam. So, we helped appetizer and main course side. Around 9-ish… I went home. Rest well. But I am damn damn damn hungry. I did not eat anything except sweet potato tong sui. Arghhh… cannot keep tummy full. Woke up and grab a mamee monster. Still hungry but too late to cook Maggie ald. Somemore watching last episode of Forensic Hero during midnight is a wrong choice. Haizzz…

Thursday- Finance class was cancelled out of sudden. Lecturer sick for the 3574-times. Hahahs… then English got some debate at lecture theatre. Some of us present our article at there. I still not yet present o. >< after lunchie, we went to kitchen and start preparing. Do ar do… and our final product was too great to be true. It’s amazing attractic+ elegant. Have fun joining kitchen team and let go f&b team for once. Hehe.. And it’s different experience. I din noe kitchen actually end much more earlier than f&b. They still need to wash, count, arrange and briefing. Huh.. long process ehh… Hmn.. that night I have a tummy upset. Went to toilet for three times and spoilt 3 toilets. Oppsie… and the food I taste that night, I can’t remember their flavor. Coz I am sick. >< While waiting for Zhen Han and Lauren, both Lings and me chit chat till more and more not sleepy. Hoho… hmn… like this already one week. Time flies. Tomorrow go back Seremban le. Hehe..

Friday- urghhh… having a hard time to wake up. The bed and my body is like attached for thousands of years. Went to class, had lunch at dai chou. During evening, I quickly take bus to pasar seni. This time, I wanna try taking bus go back. I am not willing to take KTM le. It’s too terrible. As long as still early traffic is not bad, bus is the smarter choice. Hehe.. I reached Seremban at 6 o’clock. If ktm, sure wait 99. Manage to peep a while a Terminal. Ahhh… it’s Year End Sale. I wish I could go shopping. Don’t lock me at home pls… send me out somewhere. Hehe.. I gotta feeling of going to Times Square next week. At night, went to Hawaii for dinner. Very full. Hehe..

Saturday- a wake that doesn’t need alarm. Blissful. Hehe.. Went to hubby’s place and spend whole day relaxing. Huhu~

Week 9

Monday- today is public holiday. Yeshhhhh.. I am still at Seremban lorh. Tomorrow morning oni go back. Teehee… J in a dilemma weather should I go back Seremban this weekend or stay at kl. Hehe..

Tuesday- class at 1.30pm. So, woke up early went to buy breakfast and withdraw money. Hehe.. reached kl around 11am. Start to watch drama and move on slowly. Everything was slow and steady. Nyek nyek~ went for class as usual. Came back and prepared dinner. Very tired and slept quite early.

Wednesday- today got law class and rdod practical assessment. Class finished at 12noon. But I’m back at home at 1.30. stupid Taylor’s printing system. Keep cutting my money. Ishhh… Reached home and start my happy happy galla time. Hahahas… Firstly took bath. Weather too hot ald. Then watch the curse of royal healm. From epi8à epi 21. . Geng mou..? During that time, I got myself some yam ice-cream with nuts topping. At night, I cooked chicken porridge. Quite successful sial. I am so enjoying lerh. Hoho…

Thursday- Start my day with account mini test. Then English presentation and FO practical assessment. Voila~ all pass smoothly. Hehe.. Went to see Sir Adrian to make the thinking skill trophy. At night, I cooked long bean and fried chicken. They are yummieh till max. I am getting better and better in cooking jor. Hehe.. Seriously in dilemma. However, I’ve decide not to go back this week. Nx week after finance test, I just go back bah. Or stay at kl study also okie. Hhehe.. planned to go Broga Hill on Saturday. And Sunday go kl gai gai with boyfie. Suddenly heard news of boyfie wanna go Melaka with juniors. Dunnoe y my eyes teared. Am I sad bcoz I am going to walk in the mall alone..? or sad being ditch although I am the one who date him 1^st..? or sad because the scar is not recovered yet and got tear off again..? whatever it is, who am I to make decision for him..? I seriously cannot take the responsibility. I scared that he will regret! And then we chat for sometime at night. Huh~ again communication saved the day. A little toleration and support to change plan. Boyfie going to meet them on Friday after test and come back on Saturday. Sunday plan still go on. That time, I am freakingly happy. Somehow he had changed! To be a better man for me. Hahahas… Doesn’t need to shed a tear anymore. Fall into sleep with happy heart. ^^

Friday- again 8am class since Wednesday. Hmnn.. opera class was kinda fun actually. Sit there click here and there to answer question. Hahas.. and then Mr.Gopi class. Hmnn… next Friday is his final assessment. We went to Sukimye for lunch. I fell in love to eat with them every Friday. Is like a very signature place for most of us gather, chat and eat. Heard that we got less than 10days to meet each other. So, see my cutie little face more bah. Dun stalk me at Fb when you get to see a live one now. Teehee.. Had French class. Went home and start preparing tong yuan tong sui and fried rice. Eat and watch dramas. Is so relaxing. When I am eating tong yuan I think back my past. I use to hate this glutinous ball. As I grow older, I see things differently. Things that I dislike, became like, things I like, I treasured. A bowl of tong yuan showed me that when we are at different age, far from home, and alone, we accept things differently. And a good achievement is, I dunnoe how I manage to keep RM34 till now for this whole week. It seem like I don’t have the chance to spend. Hapi hapi. Before sleep, just got message from boyfie. He is at Melaka. I thought he will be playing and forget about me. Who knows he actually got flu and needed rest. Talked for a while before sleep. Yes, all I need is to know that you’re safe and sound. A little of bedtime stories can make me fall in love also. And we postpone Broga to Sunday because it rain.

Saturday- Woke up late in the morning. And then continue drama-ing. Prepare food for myself, bath and sit in front of lappie. Is such a nice weather for walk walk. I am in a good mood too. Spending some me time is a must to have a clear mindset. Hmn… I felt quite bad. I am planning to work during holiday and now ended up holiday being fully booked by family and friends. When tot of spending money, I am a little afraid. And my fellow friends are enquiring which intake I’ll go next year. The answer is I don’t know. If my sponsorship people want me to join april, I just need to guai guai de follow. If I can choose, I’ll choose September intake. Then I can spend some time earn pocket money to survive. Drag my degree to a longer period so I can graduate later. Last time, I use to think to graduate faster will be better. but now, i wanna drag my uni lifetime. hahahas... maybe after internship, we all know what is work life going to be like ady.

Sunday- slept quite late and woke up early. prepared myself. make up and dress up properly for the first time. so i can have a proper date. hehe.. went to Times Square. walk and walk. then hubby boy came. ate lunch. continue to shop. hmn.. spend quite a lot for a pair of heels and shoes. then bought all time favourite moisturizer and salt bath. this time is hubby boy's turn to eat lunch. continue shopping. plan to go petaling street. it was raining heavily at night. so can only walk walk at sg wang. Bought nothing at sg.wang. their clothes doesn't match me aldy. had dinner and went back sri petaling. very tiring. ><

invi~

i am so useless... i don't know how to make you understand what i want. hmnnn... sad arghh... i know it's small and not really important. but somehow it affects me. i just got a little not understand. :'(

The same movie. when i asked, you say you are going to download. i understand and accept this situation to download and watch instead of going to cinema.
You and went and watch with your friends...
when the movie is already downloaded inside your lappie.
Am i invi to you..?

I just don't understand you that well~